1 year and 4 days

Today was slightly better, physically speaking, simply because I got a little more sleep yesterday and maybe my muscles are getting stronger, still tough though. But more importantly, I went and spoke to the head of the Education Department today, who has been some of the kindest people that work in this place singe I've been here. I told them my problem about administration trying to send me to the 9 month substance abuse program instead of the halfway house, and they are trying to help me out. They know my situation, know all of my future plans and have been helping me get set up for finishing school in the halfway house, etc. So they called whoever is in charge and asked to please not take me for this program and approve me for the halfway house. She even said "4 pleases". They said they can't guarantee anything but will try to convince them because they don't feel as if I need this program either. They know it's all about the beds for them - filling beds for their funding. I just hope they listen. I'm praying so hard and am so utterly distraught and stressed for tomorrow, but I'm so happy to have gotten to speak to them and still get this chance to get out of this. I shall find out tomorrow though. I honestly just want to get my life on track - go back to work, school, (and that means real work and real school, not physical slaving at a mess hall kitchen and taking easy 100-200 level basic college classes). Instead of taking my mom's money for commissary and basic needs here, I want to go back to making my own money so I can pay off my debts and gradually pay my parents back for all their support and eventually take care of them.

So, best case scenario, I will get approval for the halfway house and go as planned. Worst case scenario, I will get sent back to max for refusing the treatment program and maybe even go to lock. I don't know what I'll do if they make me go and ruin all my future plans just because they need to fill another bed. I might just be tempted to give them a piece of my mind. Sigh. Wish me luck. Pray for me. Here goes nothing =/